There’s a monster under my bed.

Not really of course.

But when depression creeps in, that’s basically what it feels like.

Logically, you know that you have plenty of things to be grateful for; so much to be happy about. Emotionally, however, that monster just growls beneath your bed, breaking the chain of thoughts and interrupting all common sense. That monster grows with every negative thought until it’s now beside you, spooning. Yep. He’s big spoon. You’re little spoon and his grip so strong around you, feigning security and comfort. He wants you to know that he understands. In reality, he’s the cause; but he’s so convincing.

I’m fortunate. I’ve got a roof over my head. Food in my fridge. My health. My family’s health. I’ve got a car to drive and gas in the tank. I’ve got clothes on my back and two careers I love. I’ve got friends to count on and besties to confide in. I’ve done some great things and I’m planning on doing many more. I raise money. I donate time. I’ve got a place I like to call home and that is totally zen where I can relax. I’ve got modern technologies that make things easier. I’ve got great coworkers and amazing support. Seemingly, I’ve got it all.

Yet, some days it take every ounce of energy just to get out of bed.

Some days I snuggle with my demons. Some days I slay them.

I know how lucky I am. I know this. I practice gratitude daily. Every damn day. Which is why it’s so hard to admit that some days I just want to quit.

It’s also what makes mental health so difficult to discuss. Say something to the wrong person and you get, “Don’t be ridiculous” or something to that effect. They discount your feelings. They don’t get it. Which is why I’ve just kept it to myself.

Even more sad, I’d decided to talk with someone about things. A professional. I’d called, emailed and messaged half a dozen psychologists/psychologists. Not one returned my call. Read that again: not one. It’s great that their businesses are booming, but what about those in need? Someone asks for help and it’s ignored. I find that incredibly scary and equally disappointing.

Some people say that depression is like drowning and watching everyone else around you breathe.

We are facing so many changes in society. There’s so much more anger in the world today. What we need is more empathy.

I pride myself on being high energy and a positive influence to all around me. That’s still true. You just don’t know what someone else is dealing with. Ever.

Be kind. Give compliments freely. Reach out to someone and thank them. Acknowledge someone. It’s really not that hard. It’s just a choice and a little bit of effort.

You just never know, you may be saving that person.

You’re certainly helping yourself along the way.